Little Red Riding Hood?

Once upon a time, on the edge of a big forest, there lived a young girl named Little Red Riding Hood. Her real name was Brenda but she was known as Little Red Riding Hood because of the red hoodie she wore since she was a baby. 

This story of Little Red Riding Hood took place on one morning. Little Red Riding hood was playing with her cat, Mittens, on the deck of her house when her mum suddenly called her, "Honey, I want you to go over to Grandma's house with some medicine and groceries. Grandma isn't very well and she hasn't been able to get out to the shops." Little Red Riding Hood was confused, she hasn't heard from Grandma or seen her in years and suddenly her mum gets a note that Grandma is sick, how strange. But she didn't ponder too much about it and just did as her mum told her to. 

Her mum prepared a basket filled with the necessities Grandma needed. Before Little Red Riding Hood left, her mum told her, "There are dangerous creatures in the woods, do not talk to anyone, just follow the path and go straight to Grandma's house." She kissed Little Red Riding Hood on her forehead, gave her the basket and sent her off. As Little Red Riding Hood entered the forest, a chill went down her spine, she had a bad feeling about this, but she couldn't keep her sick Grandma waiting.The dense forest made it almost impossible for her to see what was beyond the trees. Thank god there was a path leading straight to the other side where Grandma lived. 

Little Red Riding Hood hadn't been walking for long when she heard a rustling sound in the tress. Then suddenly a voice called out, "Little girl, little girl, could you spare me a moment?". Out of curiosity, Little Red Riding Hood strayed off the path to see where the voice was coming from. It seemed to come from a dark shadow hiding behind the trees. She couldn't make out who the mysterious figure was, all she could see were two big glowing eyes and there was a weird scent of dogs. She remembered what her mum had said about talking to strangers, but the voice was calm, relaxed and reassuring. She didn't feel as scared as she was before when she heard the stranger's voice. 

"Where are you going little girl?" said the mysterious figure.

"I'm going to my Grandma's house. She's not well and I'm delivering her some groceries." said Little Red Riding Hood. 

"Hmmm, how kind of you young one, and where does your poor Grandma live?"
said the mysterious figure.

"Oh, she lives on the other side of this forest, beside the river." said Little Red Riding Hood in her sweetest voice while smiling angelically. 

"Ahhh, what a pleasant place to live." said the mysterious figure softly, "but you mustn't keep your old Grandma waiting, off you go now dear." Little Red Riding Hood waved a hand a continued on to Grandma's house.

When Little Red Riding Hood was finally out of sight the mysterious figure popped out of the darkness. There it stood 7 feet tall, a vicious looking grey wolf, with gleaming yellow eyes. He let out a cunning smile, showing hundreds of his white knife-like teeth. Then he whispered to himself "I've found my pray." and disappeared into the darkness once more. 

Little Red Riding Hood wasn't far from Grandma's house when she noticed something weird. The house was all torn down, the windows were broken, the roof had a hole in it and the grass around it seemed like it hadn't been maintained for years. Had she found the wrong house?

 No it couldn't be the river was beside the house. Little Red Riding Hood had to at least check it out, she went up to the door and knocked a few times, there was no reply. She knocked again, still no answer. Upon closer inspection, she realized the door wasn't even locked, so she pushed it open gently. There was nothing but old furniture in the house, "Grandma?" she shouted, no reply, she walked through all the rooms but Grandma was nowhere to be found.

Suddenly there was a tap on her back. Little Red Riding Hood shrieked as soon as she turned around, she stumbled to the floor and tried to get away from the woman with empty eye sockets. The woman's face look as if it was rotten, her arms and legs weren't any better. She wore a tattered gray dress and held a stick in her hands.

The image of the witch was too
nasty so we got a better one...

 "Looks like you've gotten my message young one, you came faster than I expected." said the woman. 

"Grandma, is...that...you...?" said Little Red Riding Hood in a terrified voice.

"Grandma? Hahahahaha. Don't be pathetic, I am a witch. Your Grandma has been long dead, I have eaten her, she was quite the fat one and was able to keep me full for years, but now I'm hungry again and you'll be meeting the same fate." giggled the witch as she let out another wicked laugh. Then with a slight wave of her hand Little Red Riding Hood slowly began to lose her conscious.

When Little Red Riding Hood awoke, she found herself tied up and there was a scent of salt and pepper all over her body. She knew what had happened, the witch had seasoned her and was now ready to cook her. The witch even stuffed an apple up Little Red Riding Hood's mouth so she couldn't speak. A magical oven had appeared out of nowhere and it didn't look like it had baked any sweet muffins in it before. Little Red Riding Hood struggled with all her might but it was no use, she was tied up too tightly. She had no choice but to expect her fate.

Just as all hope was lost, the front door suddenly burst open, and muscular gray wolf came charging in towards the witch. It took out a enormous stick and smacked the witch right in the face. She flew a whole ten feet, smashing threw the old furniture and finally stopped when she hit the wall. She had passed out and the wolf took this chance to set Little Red Riding Hood free and tie the witch up. He asked Little Red Riding Hood to wait outside the house as he disposed of the witch's body. It didn't take long at all, he drew a magical circle, recited some magical words and with specific hand gestures, bright blue flames appeared out of nowhere and burnt the wicked witch along with the whole house. 

The gray wolf took Little Red Riding Hood's hands and escorted her back to her home, they weren't interested to see Grandma's house burn into ashes. The journey home was quite a funny one, they told each other funny jokes, the wolf bragged about his amazing adventures and Little Red Riding Hood was more than keen to listen. Finally, they had reached the end of the forest and it was time for the wolf to go. Little Red Riding Hood turned around and looked at the big guy, she took out a flower from her basket and gave it to him. The gray wolf smiled, he picked the flower from her hand, then without another word said he disappeared back into the dark forest.

Little Red Riding Hood then ran home as fast as she could to tell her mum what had just happened. Her mum was hugged her tightly and gave her a kiss on the head as soon as she heard the story. "Thank god you're safe." she said happily as she handed over a set of spare clothes to Little Red Riding Hood for her to shower and change into. Once Little Red Riding Hood was out of sight, her mum went to the kitchen and slammed the table, whispering to herself at the same time, "Next time, next time, I'll be sure to get rid of her just like I did with Grandma."




Joke Of The Day #7 Fairy Tale Jokes 
Did Humpty Dumpty have a good summer?
.
.
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Yeah. But he had a really bad fall.